Did you break up to make up? Stop the cycle and stay together forever!
One of the favorite soul groups of the ’70s, the Stylistics had a Top 5 recording of their song “Break Up to Make Up.” The words go like this…
This makeup breakup is all we do, first you love me, then you hate me, it’s a fools game.
The song tells about a man who is really confused and wants to know what it takes to make this woman happy. He wants to try, but he warns against trying to separate and make up. He finally admits that, if we can’t get it together, we have.
If you break up only to change after a few days and make up with your ex again and again, you might want to know how to fix your issues. Sure, you might have a good time making up with your ex, but it can be tricky. This time stop the game before you waste more time and break up feelings.
Firstly Work out what exactly you are unhappy with and that caused the quarrel and breakup. Most of the time, our hidden beliefs about relationships and family life direct our thoughts and actions toward each other. Maybe you expect a lot from the relationship early on, or you have specific ideas about what a guy should know and do.
My father knew how to fix anything in the house. Now any time my husband couldn’t fix something I was disappointed. I was judging my husband by what I think a man of the house should know how to do. Even though my father had great skills, I had to look at my husband with unique eyes. Yes, he probably couldn’t fix the kitchen sink, but he could fix our computer, a skill my dad didn’t have.
Take a look at your beliefs. Dig deep into yourself to find out what you really think about love and your boyfriend. Ask yourself these questions and write down what comes to your mind first. What do you expect from this relationship? Do you want to get married now and when? Does he know your intentions?
Hope my friend can help me…
I love it when he’s my friend…
I would stop…
I hate when… he values his family…
You will find the answer to your cycle of separation and dislocation. After discovering your weaknesses in your relationship, discuss this with your boyfriend. See how much you can agree on and what needs to change. He may love you very much, but that doesn’t mean he can read your mind and know exactly what it takes to make you happy.
Have him give you an idea of the things he’s worried about. Make a plan to work through these things together so you don’t break up making it up over and over again without solving the problem. Once you move on from your problems, you can begin to develop a strong relationship with values that will last a lifetime and prevent you from breaking up again.